Do you get anxious before games? Do you worry a lot about what other people think of you and whether or not you’ll play well?
Sports performance anxiety is one of the most common mental game challenges athletes face. And one that can quickly lead to underperforming.
Not to mention how uncomfortable it is to feel anxious every single day and how much of a toll this will take on the amount of enjoyment you feel for your sport.
So why is it, then, that acceptance helps so much with managing anxiety in sports?
It all has to do with the way our focus drives anxiety in the first place and how our focus further worsens the problem.
How Focus Fuels Anxiety
Sports performance anxiety is caused by outcome-oriented thinking. This type of thinking is where you think about what may or may not happen in the future.
An example is worrying about whether or not you’ll make mistakes in the upcoming game. The more you think about making mistakes, the more anxious you’ll become.
The same is true for thinking about how good the other team is, what your coach will think of you and so on. Anything you worry about that will happen in the future is the main driving force for anxiety.
In other words, the more you focus on the outcome and the future, the more anxious you become.
That’s how we see focus drive anxiety. So, our number one goal when working to reduce anxiety in sports is learning how to let go of the outcome, not focus on it so much, and keep our attention centered in the present moment.
Now that is a lot easier said than done, but it is absolutely possible.
However, it isn’t possible until we first practice this idea of acceptance. Because if we don’t accept our anxiety in the moment, we are only further resisting it.
Growing Anxious About being Anxious
Back when I was playing baseball, I used to get extremely anxious. So much so, that I would feel anxious days before the game even happened. This anxiety is what led me to work with a mental performance coach myself and begin working in the field of sport psychology.
One thing I remember distinctly was how much worse my anxiety became once I noticed myself feeling anxious before a game.
I would get anxious about the fact I was anxious.
This is a phenomena I see in many of the athletes I work with as well. It occurs because we know how terribly we perform when we are anxious. Therefore, we worry about the fact we feel this way and how it will impact our performance. But that worry in and of itself is anxiety, which only makes the situation ten times worse.
The more we focus on the fact we’re anxious and worry about it and wish it would go away, the more we are resisting how we currently feel. And what we resist persists, since our anxiety is caused by our focus.
As we resist the anxiety and wish it wasn’t there, we are directing the majority of our energy and attention onto the feelings of anxiety. Which results in the anxiety simply growing worse and worse.
This is why accepting our anxiety in the moment instead of resisting it is the only option we have.
What it Means to Accept Your Anxiety
I am not meaning that you should proclaim, “I am just an anxious player,” and give up all hope of managing your anxiety. That’s not what I’m referring to when I say you want to accept your anxiety.
This is more about the attitude you take once you do feel yourself becoming anxious in the moment.
Accepting anxiety in the moment means you are telling yourself it’s okay that right now you feel anxious. This is incredibly important if you want to move past the anxiety you’re feeling and get yourself focused on the game.
If I accept something, I am no longer wishing it wasn’t there. I am not spending countless amounts of energy hoping for it to go away. I am simply saying, it’s okay for you to be here.
That is the attitude we want to take to our anxiety at the moment.
By accepting our anxiety, we are taking a less stressed out and forceful approach to the situation.
If there was a way to focus on anxiety and will it away, I would be suggesting that approach. But I have yet to find a way to reduce anxiety that involves focusing on the anxiety itself and wishing it wasn’t there.
By accepting the anxiety, it’s as though we are letting out a big exhale and simply allowing it to be there.
Again, this does not mean we are wanting to feel anxious. It simply means we aren’t resisting the feeling any longer.
Talking Yourself into Accepting Your Anxiety
The way you can actionably accept your anxiety is by having a conversation with yourself. I know this can seem strange, but it’s honestly the best thing you can do in the moment.
To get a good idea of what you want to say to yourself, imagine you’re talking to a sibling or teammate who’s anxious.
What would you say to them?
Your dialogue would look something like this, “It’s okay that you’re anxious. Just accept it and know that you can play well even though you feel that way. Trust in yourself and just focus on what you can control and go out there and give full effort.”
That would be wonderful to tell a teammate and is exactly what you want to tell yourself when you feel anxious. It is through such a conversation with yourself you truly accept your anxiety in the moment.
When you accept your anxiety in the moment, you take your attention off the anxiety itself and place it on what you can control.
It is what you can control, after all, that will allow you to go out there and play your best.
Final Thoughts
Anxiety is one of the most common mental game challenges athletes deal with. It can wreak havoc on your game and cause you to not enjoy your sport anymore.
For that reason, it’s natural to fight the anxiety you’re feeling.
But fighting your anxiety only makes matters worse. Your focus is still on your anxiety.
The best thing you can do is accept the anxiety you feel in the moment.
This is not an easy thing to do, but it frees your attention and allows you to take your focus off the anxiety itself and place it on what you can control in the moment.
To accept your anxiety, be sure to have a conversation with yourself and talk to yourself like you would talk to a teammate who you’re trying to calm down when you notice they’re anxious before a game.
Thank you for reading and I wish you the best of success in all that you do.
