Fear of failure in sports is defined as being afraid of making mistakes and failing.
But is it really the mistake you’re afraid of?
Or is it something else?
Yes, the mistake ignites fear. The thought of failing can lead to scared play. But not because of the mistake itself…but due to the consequences of the mistake.
Fear of Failure is Driven By Consequences
Imagine you’re a basketball player and you’re afraid of failing during a game. What would failing look like for you?
Missing a shot, getting blocked, turning the ball over, having your defender score on you…all of those can be classified as mistakes and can lead to fear while playing.
You’re afraid of turning the ball over and so you play timidly and are extra careful with your passes.
But why are you afraid of turning the ball over? Is turning the ball over painful?
Unless you somehow get injured on the play, turning the ball over isn’t necessarily physically painful. So the act of turning the ball over isn’t something to fear.
So why are you so afraid then, that you play scared?
Because of the consequences of turning the ball over.
The true cause of the fear of failure in sports is the fear of the perceived consequences of making a mistake…not the mistake itself.
This is where we see emotional pain form.
When you turn the ball over, coach may yell at you. You may feel embarrassed. You may feel as though you let your team down. Coach may bench you. If you do it often enough, you may lose your starting position or find yourself with less and less minutes.
Then there’s the crowd factor. When you turn the ball over you might worry about what the people in the stands think of you.
Then, of course, there’s the fact that the other team got the ball and probably scored off the turnover.
All of these are consequences you want to avoid. By wanting to avoid these consequences, it’s natural to become afraid of having them happen and play scared and timid as a result.
And unfortunately, the more scared and timid you play, the more likely you are to get the consequences you’re so desperately trying to avoid.
Emotional Pain & Past Experiences
The consequences of a mistake are rarely, if ever, physically painful. Maybe there will be the occasional punishment where you run sprints for playing badly, or have to do push ups or something like that.
But even then, the embarrassment and shame of knowing you’re the reason your team is running far outweighs any physical discomfort.
It is emotional pain that drives the fear of failure.
Feeling hurt, disappointed, embarrassed, ashamed…like you let yourself and others down. That is the real pain you’re trying to avoid.
And when you do experience this type of pain, it can make fear even worse. Or be the very trigger for the development of fear within your game and the reason you are scared to make mistakes.
When you have an intense negative experience, this can leave an imprint on your subconscious. Resulting in you being afraid of having to experience such negative emotions ever again.
Let’s say you played a terrible game. You made a bunch of mistakes and it felt like nothing went your way. In your head, you were the reason your team lost. And it’s clear that’s what’s in coach’s head, too, as he screams at you in the team huddle following the game.
Now, this is a very common experience within sports. But it’s also one I’ve seen time and time again strengthen fear in a player. Causing them to feel afraid to make mistakes in the future…which only leads to timid play.
When you experience something negative, it’s only natural to want to avoid it in the future. But mistakes are going to happen. And unfortunately, the more you try to avoid mistakes, the more mistakes you make. This creates a vicious cycle of fear, timid play, mistakes, and more fear.
Fear Without a Negative Past Experience
Having an intense negative past experience isn’t required for you to develop the fear of failure. Yes, it is a major driver, but not the only one.
The second driver that’s important to recognize is your mind creating an imagined future.
Let’s say you’re afraid of failing because you don’t want to get benched. You haven’t been benched before, but the thought is nonetheless on your mind.
The more you think about not wanting to get benched, the more cautious and timid you play. This will turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy if you’re not careful.
You may not have been at risk of getting benched before, but now that you’re afraid of getting benched and are playing scared, your chances of getting benched have significantly increased.
Another example of an imagined future is if you worry about letting your parents down. This is one I see a lot in one-on-one coaching.
Since your parents do so much for you, naturally you want to pay them back. You want them to feel like all their sacrificing has been worth it. All the time and money they invested in you didn’t go to waste.
Now, the truth is, most parents just want to see you playing your hardest and enjoying yourself. In fact, that’s the only true goal I’ve heard parents express to me.
But as a player, it’s easy to think they want you to achieve an outcome. And the more you stress over achieving an outcome, the more you’ll think about not wanting to let them down. Which means…the more you’ll be afraid to fail.
Playing scared to fail because you don’t want to let your parents or anyone else down is a one-way ticket to underperforming.
But it’ll be the way you play if you allow your mind to create an imagined future, thinking about how upset they’ll be or how terrible it will feel to let them down.
Letting Go of the Fear of Consequences
The perceived consequences of what will happen if you fail are the true cause of fear of failure in sports.
These fears can be triggered by negative past experiences or by imagined futures you’ve created in your mind.
Either way, there is a consequence you want to avoid, and so you play scared.
Because in the wild, if you are afraid of something, the safest course of action is to avoid.
If you know there’s a wolf on the trail ahead of you, you turn around and get out of there. You don’t walk straight up to the wolf and pet it.
The same fear reaction is taking place in your mind during a game. The only thing is, while avoiding a wolf is the best course of action, avoiding mistakes only makes matters worse.
We see this avoidance save us in nature, but harm us during games.
In a game, you want to go head to head with the wolf. Meaning, you need to play aggressively and as you would without fear in order to reduce the chances of making mistakes.
Because that’s what you’re after in the first place, right? Avoiding the consequence?
Well, the only way to avoid the consequences of mistakes is by playing well. And to play well, you cannot play scared.
Learning to Shift Your Goal During A Game
To go from playing scared during games to playing freely, you must shift your goal.
As I said a second ago, in the wild, avoidance is the safest response to fear. It’s hardwired in our brain.
If we don’t step in and take a different action, our brains will throw us into flight mode.
But you can’t flee from the game. You’re out there on the field. So then, the only option you have is to play timid. Cowering in your own mind to the thought of messing up.
That’s if your goal is to not make any mistakes.
That goal creates fear.
Instead, you want to make your goal be to go toward success.
Go after a good game.
Play to win instead of playing not to lose.
Because something else I see a lot in athletes is that even if they don’t make any mistakes because they held themselves back, they still leave games frustrated and disappointed in themselves.
Not because they made any mistakes, but because they pretty much did nothing. They hid. They played in the shadows due to fear.
The only way to avoid this is by feeling good about the way you played the game, no matter the outcome.
Decide, how do I want to compete?
Most of the time the answer will have to do with playing aggressively and giving full effort.
Set that as your goal!
And the coolest part is, when you give full effort, you typically play your best. Which means less mistakes.
So if you’re afraid of making mistakes and you want to avoid the consequences of making mistakes, as uncomfortable and unnatural as it feels, the only option you have is to play aggressively and give full effort.
Final Thoughts
The fear of failure in sports is caused by the perceived consequences of what will happen if you fail.
This can be triggered by a past negative experience that left an impression on your subconscious, or imagined futures you have created in your mind.
Either way, it is the consequences that drive fear.
When you play scared, the natural response will be to avoid. This manifests itself in you holding yourself back and playing timidly.
To help with this, shift your goal. Change it from not making any mistakes to playing aggressively and giving full effort.
Know how you want to play (regardless of the outcome) and focus on that instead of focusing on your fear.
Thank you for reading and I wish you the best of success in all that you do.
