Scared play equals timid play. When the fear of failure takes over, we find ourselves playing with our foot on the break and holding ourselves back.
Playing with fear is not a recipe for peak performance. It is a recipe for frustration, disappointment, and underperforming.
In this article, I will cover how the fear of failure sabotages your athletic performance, and what you can do to stop playing with fear.
Fear & Avoidance
The fear of failure in sports occurs when there is a deep seeded fear about making mistakes.
However, it is not the mistake itself, but rather the consequence of the mistake that drives fear.
The fear of failure is caused by the perceived consequences of what will happen if you do make a mistake.
Such as getting benched, yelled at, feeling embarrassed, etc.
While making mistakes isn’t something you want to do, it is a natural part of competing. All athletes make mistakes. And what’s worse than making mistakes is being afraid of making mistakes.
When you play with the fear of making mistakes, this is where you find yourself playing to avoid instead of playing to win.
Story of How Fear Holds You Back
A college basketball player has been struggling during games recently. His shot’s been off, he’s turned the ball over more than usual, and he won’t drive to the basket.
He hasn’t lost his talent. He’s still doing well in practice. He especially does well when training on his own or with one or two teammates.
Something changes, though, when he gets into a game.
What changes is his level of fear.
During practice, there isn’t as much fear of failure present. Practices are where mistakes are welcomed and the focus is on getting better, not performing perfectly.
During games his mindset shifts to making no mistakes and playing his best.
That simple shift creates fear. Fear surrounding the possibility of making mistakes, maybe getting benched, and above all else, feeling disappointed in himself.
Unfortunately, this fear is the very cause of his poor play.
Since his mind is focused on not wanting to mess up, avoiding mistakes becomes his top priority. This avoidance motivation leads to a change in physical behavior.
For one, he doesn’t call for the ball as much. He goes into the corner and hides, hoping the ball isn’t passed to him. If he doesn’t get the ball, he can’t make a mistake.
Since he’s not wanting the ball, he’s not ready for it when it is passed to him. This leads to hesitation.
Instead of catching and shooting quickly, like he does in practice, he overthinks the shot. Not only does overthinking cause stiff and rigid shooting, it also allows the defense to close in. Turning an open shot into a contested shot.
He’s also not driving to the basket due to fear. Driving to the basket is something he does well and a part of his game coach wants to see. However, driving to the basket is also risky and the chances of losing the ball are great.
As a result, he passes the ball off instead of driving to the basket and finishing at the rim.
All in all, he’s holding himself back simply due to fear. Fear that leads to a need to avoid and scared and timid play.
Playing to Avoid Due to Fear
The main way fear of failure sabotages your performance is avoidance.
If I don’t want something bad to happen, a safe way to make sure the bad thing doesn’t happen is to avoid the situation in which it can happen.
This was shown clearly through the story of the basketball player.
He didn’t want to miss shots, turn the ball over, or mess up any other way, and so he played timidly, didn’t call for the ball, passed up open shots, and didn’t drive to the basket.
But there are two huge problems with this pattern of avoidance:
- Avoiding leaves you disappointed.
- Avoiding leads to more mistakes.
When you play to avoid, you hold yourself back. So even if you don’t make a lot of mistakes, you won’t be effective on the field or court.
This lack of effectiveness will leave you feeling disappointed and frustrated in your play.
Yes, you may not have made a ton of mistakes, but you know deep down you held yourself back and didn’t play the way you know you can.
When you avoid, you also increase the chances of making mistakes. This is the most frustrating aspect of fear leading to avoidance behavior.
Avoiding feels safe in the moment, but it honestly is the worst choice in terms of the impact it has on your level of play.
Going back to the basketball player example,when he played to avoid mistakes, he didn’t want the ball. When the ball was passed to him, he hesitated, was stiff when shooting, and ended up shooting more contested shots due to his hesitation.
All of which only increased the chances of him missing and experiencing the mistake he so desperately wanted to avoid.
By playing to avoid mistakes, you only hold yourself back. Which is why we must work on generating a mindset shift that will help you play your best, even during games when you experience fear.
Changing the Way You Play With Fear
When I’m working with an athlete on managing fear of failure, we focus on managing the fear long-term and managing fear in the moment.
Long-term, you want to work on building your confidence and reducing the amount of emphasis you place on the consequences of failing. That will work to strip away the amount of fear you play with.
What we’re focusing on within this article, though, is how fear of failure sabotages your immediate performance. So the tip I have for you focuses on managing fear in the short-term.
When you experience fear in the moment, the fear is already there. We are in reactive mode. You have felt fear, and now your mind and body are responding to the fear you feel.
Do you remember what I said earlier is the mind’s automatic response to fear?
Avoidance.
Your mind will want to keep you safe. The way it will keep you safe is avoiding that which you’re afraid of.
Unfortunately, during competition this manifests in you holding yourself back and playing it safe. We need to consciously do the opposite.
Playing More Aggressively
I was talking with a pitcher recently about managing fear. He fears walking batters.
When he’s on the mound and experiences this fear, his automatic response is to throw the ball slower and try to place the pitch.
He tries too hard to aim the ball.
The result is more often than not a ball.
But hold on a second…how is it that his natural response to fear, the response that feels safe, leads to the very outcome he’s afraid of?
Because playing timid and holding yourself back due to fear changes the way you play. A change that does nothing but cause you to underperform.
Knowing his automatic response to fear is throwing slower and trying too hard to place the pitch, we talked about going to the other extreme.
His goal when he feels fear on the mound is to focus on throwing the ball hard. Not trying to aim it or anything. Just pick his target and throw hard.
He admitted that this seemed scary and would be uncomfortable. And I reassured him it would feel very scary and uncomfortable. But what feels safe in that moment is actually the worst option for him. Since it is the option that leads to him walking batters.
The way you can use this idea for yourself is to identify the behavioral change you experience when playing with fear. Then, ask yourself what the opposite would be. How would you want to play that would give you the best chance of success?
Because remember, your goal isn’t to make no mistakes, it’s to play well. Therefore, you need to play in a way that increases the odds of you playing well, instead of playing in a way that feels safe.
Final Thoughts
Fear of failure sabotages athletic performance because it causes you to hold yourself back.
Fear leads to avoidance. We want to avoid that which we’re afraid of. Unfortunately, when we strive to avoid negative outcomes in sports, we end up playing timidly and hesitantly. Which only further worsens performance and leads to more and more fear.
Knowing the mind’s natural response to fear is playing scared and holding yourself back, set your goal to be the opposite.
Focus on playing aggressively, no matter how uncomfortable it may feel in the moment.
Thank you for reading and I wish you the best of success in all that you do.
